The stollen consciousness

No matter how angry you are, admin rights does give you the right to delete, but it does not give you the right to change history. For some reason i take this personal.

Once you publish an idea, it's not your right to just delete it. you can definitely criticize it, but not delete it. Why? Because once it is published, it becomes part of the consciousness of those who read it.

Return what you have stollen!

The book of secrets

You once felt you inhabited that house. You now feel like you have never been there. Is there a more agonizing feeling than peeking into your own home, and not recognizing it?

Walk on!

"Why even sneak a peek at this one?" Look away!! Neither is she going to be more beautiful, nor are you ever going to love another. Why bother then?

Thank You!

The H word

Happiness? i stopped thinking this was an attribute of this life. But i do believe in another. I believe it's a necessity, a scientific must. That life after life; where veils fall and the real story is known, where deeds are coupled with intentions, where perceptions give way to truth, where immortality replaces time, where absolute replaces relative, where happiness replaces joy, where peace replaces patience. I am so longing for it

A stranger

I'm feeling like a stranger in my own skin. But that's not different from how i have been feeling for all my life; a stranger. Not that i am deprived of those who love me. On the contrary. Right from the day i was born, i was surrounded with love. My nuclear family as well as my extended family. I have friends; not too many of them, but a close few.

All that and i have never felt at ease sharing my true self with anyone. I remember traces of how i used to feel as a kid; thousands of unanswered questions; actually unasked questions. I learnt so early on to keep my feelings to myself. Don't know why. May be because i realized very early that i was too weak to get disappointed from those i love most.

Or may be it is the lifetime curse of being too sensitive to accept insincere interest and too proud to accept less than full attention. Possessive? Oh absolutely. But may be with low self esteem. May be with a deep feeling that i do not deserve full attention. May be ...

I am love deprived. That's for sure. Understanding deprived. Real conversation deprived. Sharing deprived. Deprivation shows into my eyes. For those who are intimate enough and interested enough, they can detect it. i am a master of disguise though. Look at me and you'll find a confident successful saavy business person. But see me and you'll find a troubled self, craving for recognition, for peace.

I am a mix of opposites. How can i be that much of a positive forward looking person who believes in beauty and fairness, who prides in secret for being faithful in the justice and grace of God, and in the meantime fail to remember a happy day? One happy day?